Ok...so I know everyone hates a complainer. But you're just gonna have to get ready to hate me, cause I'm back with another list of complaints. My job at the Restarante y Cantina has been reduced to very part time, which has actually allowed me to enjoy it just a little more. But yesterday..oh, yesterday. Why do the horribly rainy days always seem to bring out the people that were raised by wolves? And considering that we get quite a bit of rain up in these-here parts, the wolves seem to be letting their cubs out on a fairly regular basis.
The Greedy Wolves:
As does every Mexican restaurant in North America (I imagine), we give out chips and salsa to every table once the customers have been seated. Now, I understand being hungry ( and I'm not talking about in the starving-famine-malnutrtion sense, but more like in the my-ass-no-longer-fits-in-my-jeans sense), and it's always pleasant to have a lil somethin to tide you over while you decide what to order. I even get needing a second serving of chips and salsa, especially if the table consists of a family with children or just of grown men. However...after your food arrives (and our plates are big and laden with food), do you really NEED more chips and salsa? Salsa, yes, but another big-ass bowl of chips? Come on. You're not going to eat them. People just want free stuff, as much as they can get. Even if they won't use what ever is being offered, people (Americans?) feel this insane sense of ENTITLEMENT. (More on that word and my absolute loathing of it during some other bitch-fest, sorry.) Customers always marvel at the fact that everything we serve at the Restarante is fresh, hand-made, and from scratch. What they don't stop to think about is the time and man-power it takes for the tortillas to be made, cut into chip-appropriate triangles, and deep fried. All chips that reamain uneaten must be thrown away, even if they were untouched. It's horribly wasteful.
So hey, Greedy, next time you're out at your neighborhood Mexican restaurant (or anywhere else there is something "free" for you take), and your chip-bowl is empty, remember: a lot of work goes into those chips that you're not going to eat, yes, it's ok not to have a refill, and you can always order dessert later if you still feel the need to stuff your face.
The Oblivious Wolves:
As I mentioned earlier during my rant about The Greedy Wolves, our plates are huge and piled high with delicious, mouth-watering authentic Mexican food. (You'll find no yellow cheese here, gracias.) Over the thousand years I've been waiting tables, I've learned to carry more than two plates to a table: skillfully balancing plates on the arm is effective, albeit a disaster waiting to happen, considering I'm a top-notch klutz. So as I'm heading to your table, and you begin remarking about the approach of your food and how good it looks, that would be a good time, yes, that would be the PERFECT time for you to make room for the plate. Please clear away newspapers, books, bowls of chips and salsa, any errant item that might get in the way of me promptly placing your meal in front of you. Now, is this how the scenario plays itself out? Rarely. Not until I've finally plunked down one of the heavy, hot-ass plates on one of their screaming, wolf-child's coloring menu, much to the dismay of wolf- child, do they then start wildly clearing stuff.
Also, as the plate is coming down towards you, heading for the spot in front of you on the table, DON'T GRAB THE PLATE. It is my job to serve you, which means setting the plate down on the table. Nine times out of ten you'll burn yourself on the hot plate, anyway. Doesn't me using pot holders and saying, "Be careful, your plate is hot" register at all? Of course not, you're a wild animal!
Just Plain Wolves:
When someone greets you( "Hi!, "Hello", Hola!") what do you do? Usually respond in the same manner, no? Seems logical. But alas, it is not. When you come through the front door and I'm standing there smiling, menus in hand, greeting your ass , the proper response is NOT any of the following:
The Greedy Wolves:
As does every Mexican restaurant in North America (I imagine), we give out chips and salsa to every table once the customers have been seated. Now, I understand being hungry ( and I'm not talking about in the starving-famine-malnutrtion sense, but more like in the my-ass-no-longer-fits-in-my-jeans sense), and it's always pleasant to have a lil somethin to tide you over while you decide what to order. I even get needing a second serving of chips and salsa, especially if the table consists of a family with children or just of grown men. However...after your food arrives (and our plates are big and laden with food), do you really NEED more chips and salsa? Salsa, yes, but another big-ass bowl of chips? Come on. You're not going to eat them. People just want free stuff, as much as they can get. Even if they won't use what ever is being offered, people (Americans?) feel this insane sense of ENTITLEMENT. (More on that word and my absolute loathing of it during some other bitch-fest, sorry.) Customers always marvel at the fact that everything we serve at the Restarante is fresh, hand-made, and from scratch. What they don't stop to think about is the time and man-power it takes for the tortillas to be made, cut into chip-appropriate triangles, and deep fried. All chips that reamain uneaten must be thrown away, even if they were untouched. It's horribly wasteful.
So hey, Greedy, next time you're out at your neighborhood Mexican restaurant (or anywhere else there is something "free" for you take), and your chip-bowl is empty, remember: a lot of work goes into those chips that you're not going to eat, yes, it's ok not to have a refill, and you can always order dessert later if you still feel the need to stuff your face.
The Oblivious Wolves:
As I mentioned earlier during my rant about The Greedy Wolves, our plates are huge and piled high with delicious, mouth-watering authentic Mexican food. (You'll find no yellow cheese here, gracias.) Over the thousand years I've been waiting tables, I've learned to carry more than two plates to a table: skillfully balancing plates on the arm is effective, albeit a disaster waiting to happen, considering I'm a top-notch klutz. So as I'm heading to your table, and you begin remarking about the approach of your food and how good it looks, that would be a good time, yes, that would be the PERFECT time for you to make room for the plate. Please clear away newspapers, books, bowls of chips and salsa, any errant item that might get in the way of me promptly placing your meal in front of you. Now, is this how the scenario plays itself out? Rarely. Not until I've finally plunked down one of the heavy, hot-ass plates on one of their screaming, wolf-child's coloring menu, much to the dismay of wolf- child, do they then start wildly clearing stuff.
Also, as the plate is coming down towards you, heading for the spot in front of you on the table, DON'T GRAB THE PLATE. It is my job to serve you, which means setting the plate down on the table. Nine times out of ten you'll burn yourself on the hot plate, anyway. Doesn't me using pot holders and saying, "Be careful, your plate is hot" register at all? Of course not, you're a wild animal!
Just Plain Wolves:
When someone greets you( "Hi!, "Hello", Hola!") what do you do? Usually respond in the same manner, no? Seems logical. But alas, it is not. When you come through the front door and I'm standing there smiling, menus in hand, greeting your ass , the proper response is NOT any of the following:
- stating the number of people in your party vocally or by holding up that same number of fingers like some damn pre-schooler
- continuing to talk to each other
- staring at me blankly
- talking on your cellphone
- ignoring me altogether
Just say "hello" in kind. That's all I ask, it's not hard. Just acknowledge my existance as a real-live human being for two seconds, and I guarantee, I will give you the best service possible. Otherwise, believe me, you'll wish you'd opted for Chinese.
Sigh...that's better. Anyone who made it to the end of this ridiculously long rager of an entry, muchas gracias. Next time there will be a lot more unicorns and rainbows, I promise.
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