SUPERHEROES!

Superheroes are real. Honestly. And they all live here, where I live.

You want to know how I know? Let me tell you. Today, the temperature never rose over 35 degrees. It was a beautiful day, yes: clear, sunny, bright blue sky. But it was still cold.

So I'm meandering through Downtown, windowshopping and secretly laughing at people, when I see something utterly unbelievable. A woman walking towards me with a heavy winter coat, a scarf, a hat, gloves...and SANDALS.

Now this wasn't the first time I'd seen someone who'd obviously forgotten that January comes before July. It happens. But this particular woman was amazing- she kept rubbing her hands together and adjusting her coat collar as if she were trying to warm herself up, but when crossing the street, she stepped right into a pool of melting snow and didn't even flinch.

It's just one person, I told myself. Maybe she woke up late and couldn't find her shoes. Maybe she has prosthetic legs so it doesn't matter what kind of shoes she wears, cause she can't feel anything anyway. Who knows? So I keep going.

A few minutes later, what do I see? A man wearing a sweater, gloves, and SHORTS. And as the afternoon wore on, there was more: a teenage girl wearing FLIP FLOPS and a denim MINISKIRT, a woman wearing a knee length dress with NO PANTYHOSE and SLINGBACK/OPEN TOED SHOES, a man with a T SHIRT and NO JACKET, and a couple both wearing jean SHORTS, long sleeved shirts and NO COATS.

By the end of this unbelievable fashion show, I'm completely bewildered. It's fucking freezing! My hand are frozen through my gloves! Can't these people feel the cold?

And that's when it dawns on me--they must be superheroes! There is no other explanation for what I'd seen. They're immune to the elements, that must be one of their superpowers. What that is used for, I have not yet figured out, but I'm sure there is a purpose.

I was so relieved! I was so glad I'd found the answer. That has to be it, it must.

Otherwise, nothing would make sense ever again.